The Buffoon And The Lyrics

song lyrics The Buffoon And The Dean Of Admissions lyrics "And now a buffoon s meeting with the dean of admissions at a prestigious college." [Dean:] "Well Michael, I would like to extend my warmest congradulations on your upcoming graduation and I understand you are interested in matriculating here in the fall." [Buffoon:] "I got a snake, man!" [Dean:] "Yes, pets are welcome here on campus. Be it the traditional dog, or cat, or even the occasional reptile." [Buffoon:] "One time I fed it some beer man! It was slithering this way and that! It was all fucked up!" [Dean:] "I m sure it was. Well we discourage inappropriate drinking among both students and pets here on campus." [Buffoon:] "Fuckin Shit!" [Dean:] "Yes, that s a not uncommon reaction to this policy. So tell me a little bit more about your background." [Buffoon:] "My father s a fucking asshole, man!" [Dean:] "Hmm, I see. Your feelings of rebelion are not unusual at your age son." [Buffoon:] "My mother s a piece of shit too!" [Dean:] "Well, I hope you can find an outlet for your hostility over the summer so you can come to school in the fall relaxed and ready to learn." [Buffoon:] "My teacher in high school was a stupid bitch, man! She had her head way up her ass!" [Dean:] "Well the quality of the faculty at a University such as ours far exceeds that of a local public high school." [Buffoon:] "Your secretary s a real fat bitch, man!" [Dean:] "Yes, she s tried many diets over the years with minimal success." [Buffoon:] "I had diarhea last month. I had to shit all fucking day!" [Dean:] "Uh huh, Well we all get the occasional stomach bug, never a pleasurable experience. So have you given any thought to your choice of major?" [Buffoon:] "I ve got a big fucking boner right now." [Dean:] "I see. Well sexual arrousal is not uncommon during periods of nervous tension. I do not take offense." [Buffoon:] "One time I ate my neighbors shit!" [Dean:] "That s understandable. Well, I enjoyed meeting you. We ll be sending you our decision by the end of the month." [Buffoon:] "I bet you got really hairy balls." [Dean:] "Yes, it s a veritable forest down there. Bye bye." song lyrics